Wednesday, December 3, 2008

Objective Conservative seeks bailout

With banks, insurance companies, auto manufacturers and states now seeking bailouts what could be next? Maybe cities? Newspapers? When and where will it end?

Well, we at the Objective Conservative think we need a bailout too! It's only fair. After all, we fit the mold. We have too much competition, too little talent and ability. We seldom change. We have little or no financial resources and no one ever clicks any of the google ads that generate a penny or so to help us pay our bills.

Uncle Sugar (Uncle Sam, Santa Claus), couldn't we just have a couple of hundred dollars if we promise to quit being so cynical about government? We promise not to criticize the president-elect or the Democrat leadership. We'll sell our corporate jet and buy a big three vehicle that gets at least 35 miles per gallon. No more expensive planning sessions at vacation resorts. We Promise.

PLEASEEEEEEEEEEEE. Just a little bailout?

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

You need the Bailout Christmas wish list. Makes a fine Christmas letter.

Mberenis said...

The bailout isn't all negative if you consider the ease it has made on lending and the financial system since initiation. I've been doing some research, and there's more grants and lower APR's out there now than before. Bailout is for you too!